Life of Pride

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Life of Pride

Friday, December 01, 2006

I told some people tonight that I couldn't wait to graduate; that I wished I was graduating at the end of this semester. I'm not sure why I said that. I wasn't trying to lie intentionally, but that's what it was. The funny thing was that only an hour before, in the middle of Chorale practice, I'd been tearing up over the sudden wave of nostalgia that hit me - the knowledge that in a few short months this is gonna be all. No more undergraduate education.

I think I deny it when I am truly vulnerable to someone or something. I love PHC. There. I'll just say it. I'm delighted that I'm not graduating this semester, 'cause I still have loose ends to tie up. And people to serve. Sure, I have more possibilities for pain here. I'm feeling considerable pain right now for various reasons. But this fire refines me.

I just wish I hadn't said that. Why did I say it?

¶ 7:36 PM

Comments:

I think it is very nice that you do not want to leave PHC before your time, so to speak. It's always good to enjoy something to the end. But, rest assured, life gets even better after graduation. I think you'll love the increased freedom and make good use of it.

# posted by

Unknown : 1:37 PM

I personally only have one motivation at a time. ;-)

# posted by

J. Nathan Matias : 1:32 PM

Oh, and glad to hear that you're looking forward to things with enthusiasm, faith, and the wisdom about suffering which comes from Christ. Praying for you.

# posted by

J. Nathan Matias : 1:34 PM

I'm glad for you that your leaving will be bittersweet - it's best that way.

# posted by

Gabi : 2:25 PM

Why blog? Everyone's doing it. Normally that would be enough to keep me far, far away, but the concept is too cool. Spread your personal thoughts to the world - far better than talking, because you can say anything, and you don't need the courage to look someone in the eye. So, with these reasons in mind, I have embarked. Enjoy, or not, as the case may be. I know I will.

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