Why can't I write an entire idea all at once? Why must I narrow, narrow, narrow everything? The written language condenses everything down into tiny bites. The bites themselves don't make a meal, especially if you wander around sneaking them from different people's plates.

There's never time to write. I make it where I can, by molding school assignments as closely as I can to what I want to be doing. Nothing is _just_ an assignment. Everything has a purpose for me, either to increase my knowledge in an area that fascinates me or to describe a thought I may use some day on a larger scale. But still, it's all piecemeal. I have to sacrifice parts of everything for the sake of time.

I can never do anything that's perfect. Ever. This is a fact of my fallen nature as a human being. I can't accept this entirely, however. I have to keep striving, running faster and pushing harder. This is not so that I in myself might be perfect, but so that I might be more useful to God. He made me very capable, more so than many people. There must be a reason for that.

I thank God for friends, and that I am not alone. My friends have taught me so much. Probably my longest friend, a guy who goes to another college, reassures me frequently that God doesn't wait to use people. God is using me right now, in the little, imperfect, piecemeal bits of everything I'm creating with time and effort. He's using me as I write this blog post. I don't know how, but that doesn't affect the basic fact that He is. I thank Him for that.
  ¶ 1:09 PM (0) comments

  There's too much to catch up. I can't do it now. I have a paper to write, a history midterm to study for, and 70 pages of history reading to do for my other two history classes, one of which, no doubt, will contain a quiz. This is all needed for tomorrow. Besides that - well, I don't want to get into my other responsibilities. There are too many.

My real purpose in writing is to express mild outrage. I have just discovered that one of my good friends, whom I have not talked to in two weeks, is giving a presentation on parliamentary procedure tomorrow evening at my college. One would think I should have known this before I received the general announcement in my inbox on this end of things. I admittedly heard echoes of it on this end from another good friend, who has formed a much newer friendship with the first-mentioned friend. Still, as is the classic situation, I don't really know in detail anything that's going on.

My life is full of so much stress right now. What shall I do? I shall read the following verses again:
"Thus saith the Lord, Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, neither let the mighty man glory in his might, let not the rich man glory in his riches: But let him that glorieth glory in this, that he understandeth and knoweth me, that I am the Lord which exercise lovingkindness, judgment, and righteousness, in the earth: for in these things I delight, saith the Lord" (Jeremiah 9.23-24, KJV).
  ¶ 6:27 PM (0) comments