"The fear of the Lord is a fountain of life." So reads my meditation verse for the day. The 'fear of the Lord' - that means the knowledge that I am clay in His hands. He can do absolutely anything He wants with me. So then, how does that turn into a 'fountain of life?'

It's because it is the truth. There is no foundation for life but the truth. It springs up into the living water, Jesus Christ, the proof of God's love. So my Lord God presses me into shape with His mighty fingers, incrementally and inexorably impressing His image on my soul. The closer I draw, the deeper I submit, the faster the process. And it will never end. I can always drink a fresher draught than I ever knew.

My Lord says that He delights to reward those who diligently seek Him. During college, I thought I was doing so well. Sophomore year I asked Jesus to be my Lord, not just my Savior. That next summer, I started stretching my fledgling wings of prayer. Junior year through first senior semester, I read through the Bible for the first time cover-to-cover. Then I spent eight months at home, and I learned God was sufficient for my solitude. I started praying for my Lord to teach me about love, and I returned to finish out my time as a college student. I entered upon a test in which "I" was erased, and I dove into the valley of the shadow of death.

In four years, I have already been transformed, but I know I am only beginning. How exciting!

In a tentative way, this last Sunday I went to seek the Lord. I fasted, and I drove alone to a favorite hiking spot. It was chilly, so nobody else was about. Nobody. At the top of the cliff, a high wind puffed clouds across the sky. Down below, dead trees swayed. Once, as I watched, the faraway stick of a trunk cracked in two, and its top sank in slow motion down among its brethren. Otherwise, the caw of a crow and the rushing wind were the only sounds.

I climbed down to a ledge on the cliff, and I let the wind rush overhead. I read Bible, and I listened to the stillness. Natural solitude has much to say. It disappears into one's soul and leaves a calm space that swallows up hurt.  ¶ 10:26 AM