Life of Pride
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Here I sit in Market Street Coffee, downloading a TV show, reading comments to my blog, studying for History of Islam, and typing a blog post. I reflect that my life is the most real right now that it has ever been. This semester at school I am more free than I have ever been. How odd that it should be this way when I have given away more of my personal desire for power than I ever have before. Somehow my lack of grasping has left me free to be me.
So who am I? I am silly and funny, and I like to dance and juggle. I write. I organize. I love God passionately. I love my family, friends, and school. I'm also intelligent, which can be a problem, because I'm used to being right. It makes it hard to recognize when I am not. Therefore, I must assume by default that I could be wrong and go from there.
What else? I like techno and even some hip-hop. I want to learn to surf and ski. I want to see the Aurora Borealis and many other places in this world that God has created. I desire and pray desperately for unity in the body of Christ. I am sad bone-deep for people with hurting eyes.
Music makes me cry and laugh. I wish I was better at it. There isn't enough music in me to match how I feel about God and life.
I am very confident about most things, but only because they don't matter. People matter, and I am so aware of how I can and do fail people every day. Especially family, the ones who know me best and who are hardest to love properly. I am completely insufficient in love.
Good things will happen in my life this year. I know it.
So who am I? I am silly and funny, and I like to dance and juggle. I write. I organize. I love God passionately. I love my family, friends, and school. I'm also intelligent, which can be a problem, because I'm used to being right. It makes it hard to recognize when I am not. Therefore, I must assume by default that I could be wrong and go from there.
What else? I like techno and even some hip-hop. I want to learn to surf and ski. I want to see the Aurora Borealis and many other places in this world that God has created. I desire and pray desperately for unity in the body of Christ. I am sad bone-deep for people with hurting eyes.
Music makes me cry and laugh. I wish I was better at it. There isn't enough music in me to match how I feel about God and life.
I am very confident about most things, but only because they don't matter. People matter, and I am so aware of how I can and do fail people every day. Especially family, the ones who know me best and who are hardest to love properly. I am completely insufficient in love.
Good things will happen in my life this year. I know it.
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